Saturday, August 13, 2005

Hiding Out

Let's get all mathematical.

Jon Cryer - Molly Ringwald + Keith Coogan (awful 80's music that no self-respecting kid ever listened to) / impacted fecal matter = Hiding Out.

My entire nervous system squirted out from under my finger nails.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

"I am the devil and I am here to do the devil's work."



So sums up Rob Zombie’s sophomore effort The Devil’s Rejects. Delivered with menacing grace by one of the titular “rejects” in response to the horror movie victims perennial query of “Why?”.

Less of a sequel and more of a reboot to Zombie’s House of 1000 Corpses, the writer/director/rock god, shows that he has learned his lessons from his first film and delivered a more consistently rewarding, sure-footed effort. The Devil’s Rejects isn’t a camp horror movie like it’s predecessor. It’s a Killers-On-The-Road flick. There are horrors aplenty, however.

We are reacquainted with the hick Satanists that comprise the Firefly clan in their dilapidated Texas ranch house. Sheriff Wydell, played by William Forsythe in what henceforth shall be known as a Forsythian performance, and his posse of lawmen are locked and loaded to take out the trash. A truly kickass gunbattle unfurls. Otis Driftwood and Baby, played by Bill Mosely and Zombie’s stunner of a wife Sherri Moon-Zombie respectively, escape into the rundown, podunk wilds of Texas to wreak more mayhem.

The movie kicks into gear as they are joined by their “father”, the creepiest clown since that little fucker under the bed in Poltergeist, Captain Spaulding, played by b-movie legend Sid Haig.


This is a movie that is wonderfully amoral. As the culture grows more alarmingly homogenized, The Devil’s Rejects seeks to remind us of the dirty movies of our not-too-distant past. The kind of flicks that played 2 for a dollar at your local shithouse theater. Movies that served utterly no purpose but to shock and offend. I welcome their brief return.

What I find so interesting about The Devil’s Rejects is that it isn’t just shock value. Zombie actually has something to say about our morals and sense of retribution. The Firefly clan are clearly the protagonists. While they murder and rape without the slightest hint of remorse, they are also a hysterically normal “family”. Replete with big brother /kid sister squabbles, protective daddy, and albeit very dark senses of humor. That is when there are no innocents to torture. Zombie contrasts their flight from the law with Sheriff Wydell’s descent into madness. As noble as his intentions for ridding the earth of this scum, his zeal gives way to murderous intent.

It is also abundantly clear that Rob Zombie loves him Star Wars, particularly The Empire Strikes Back.

I can’t wait to see what he has in store for us next.

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

I Love This